Saturday, September 16, 2006

Breaking News: Breastgate!

This just in! According to reliable sources, at approximately 1:37 PM EST on Tuesday, an unidentified woman known only as "Jessica Valenti" of Feministing was able to sneak a pair of breasts into close proximity to former President Bill Clinton undetected. Concealed under only a shirt and (possibly) brassiere, the offending breasts were only discovered thanks to the perspicacity of keen-eyed observer Ann Althouse, followed up by Dr. Helen Smith and her husband, Glenn Reynolds. When last seen, the trio were attempting to locate Jessica for an intervention using a burqah and a chastity belt, in accordance with their One and True Feminism.

Obviously, this is just the break President Bush and his followers have been looking for in the Global War Struggle Against War on Terror Terrorism Islamic extremism brown people Islamonazism Islamofascism Islamofeminazism Breasts. Nothing could be more important in stopping the Brown Menace. We'll keep you abreast of developments as they come in.

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